“Whitaker! Declan! Deschel!” These are some of the oh-so-2012 names I heard a mama calling out at the playground last month. The search for our baby’s name is once again one of my favorite to do’s in this journey from conception to birth. The Nameberry website is full of name aficionados who weigh in very thoroughly on different names and even have complete names picked out for future offspring.

After Micah was born, we were handed the paperwork for his birth certificate. Though we had a first and middle name in mind for a while, it was too final. We possessed too much power as his parents. Once we wrote down “Micah Logan Kim” in black ink, we would be presenting him to the government and to the world as none other than Micah Logan Kim, though yes, I know he can go off to college and have folks call him “Jeremy” or just a symbol.

One general “rule” for coming across the perfect name is that it must click for us as a family. Who WE are. Our general essence. This has largely been a process of elimination and sometimes knocks out solid names:

We are not hippies. (Poppy.)

We are not first-generation Chinese. (Harrison).

We are not Southern. (Rhett. Wyatt. Graham.)

Nor do we have an inheritance. (Preston. Greyson.)

We are not strippers.

We are not WASPs.

We are not actually Black though one of us claims so much flava to save yo neighba’. (Denzel. Oprah. Le’Jihee.)

We are not hipsters or even hip. (Chance. Jazz.)

We are not truly Jewish no matter how much we love Hebrew names (Nevaeh. Noam.)

We are not as Korean as I think. (rejecting almost all Korean names just based on sound and strict Kim family naming rules).

No, Kevin, we cannot name baby after a Met, a Celtic, one William Joel, one Kemba Walker, or someone else with the middle name Walker!

It must not clash with the family surname. (Faye. Shea. Cam.)

Watch out for bad initials.

Some names we do not even consider as fine as they are because they have just become way too popular in recent years.

We love Biblical names but meaning matters so much. Example: I love “Abel” but I believe he was the first murder victim in the Bible. At the hands of his brother. I cannot overlook that.

Meaning of the name in general is key. “Griffin” is a cute name but it means “hooked nose.” Another name we still like means “raider” or “fighter.” “Russell” is “little red.” “Drake” can mean dragon (cool!) but also duck. Occupational names like Mason or Jagger are also cute but can influence their fate. (I had a librarian named Mrs. Read. My friend’s doctor is named Dr. Wells.)

We would love the name(s) to consist of five letters to match the three of us. We think we’ve committed to a first name for either boy or girl but are still brainstorming for the middle names. Looking for that elusive click.

There is still some time. We would love to hear some suggestions. Goodnight!